Well, few people know that our ride to 13 years of marriage has had it's ups and the very ugly downs. But here we are and we are not taking it lightly anymore but conscious of every step and decision we make together.
So here's my 13 things that I have learned.
1. Marry Your Equal
Make sure there are a lot more things in common that you agree and share together so that there will be less unhappy surprises.
2. Marriage is Hard. Period.
As the time goes by, you might wondered if you partnered with the wrong guy, but reality sets and you REALLY start getting to know each other's flaws. Do not run from it but tackle it with patience and grace.
3. Get over it!
We are not perfect! I like things a certain way and I have to accept and learn that his shoes left on the kitchen counter may not be as dirty as they look.
4. It's What You Do that Counts.
It doesn't matter if I'm not a morning person or that he's not a late night person. Work on a happy medium.
Make each other feel special for how much they mean to you.
5. Strangest Things Do Work!
When they happen don't over analyze it. Take it and run with it.
Such is the case when we bought a brand new car in both of our names a month before our divorce was to be finalized. Thankfully, the car helped us her to Houston and no divorced happened.
6. People Change.
I did. I see my wedding gown and I dont like it anymore so off to goodwill it went.
When two people help each other to grow, it will flourish.
7. Touch
Hold hands. Always.
8. Dialog
Dialog about each other's feelings. It's is important to know what your spouse is going through. Never judge their feelings or tell them they shouldn't feel a certain way. Instead say; tell me more.
9. Kids
When you have kids everything changes!
Including your marriage and it should. It should make it stronger! Team up and be on the same page. You got differently personalities to raise and accommodate in your life. But never forget to make time for each other. And lead by example.
10. Planning
Always take into consideration their ideas and suggestion as you would like him to take yours. You will be happier and not fight so much on the road.
11. Don't Forget Who You Are
You are still an individual with needs and wants. If your spouse respects your individuality, you chose correctly.
12. Help!
Don't ever think you are the only one with marriage problems. Seek help before it's too late. I made that mistake.
12. Live, Love, and Laugh!
Together! Even when he farts and wakes you up from deep sleep!
13. Forgiveness
Know how to truly forgive.
It is always a struggle and not an easy task but forgiveness can open the doors to unimaginable things.