Friday, April 30, 2010
This was a very tragic accident and we are all coping in very different ways. There is not a single way to grieve. There are many ways. Some chose to grieve in public, some, like me, chose to grieve in private.
My father and I didn't have a "fantastic" relationship, we had a "distant" relationship. However, I still loved him, my way. There are only two people close to me who know exactly how I feel about him. I pray that the Lord allows him a second chance for him to renew all his relationships, including mine.
As I watch him on his ICU bed, motionless, I go back in time thinking how different things could have been. The "What If" questions start pouring on my head. During this last 16 days, I have felt a mixture of emotions all in one. I have felt anger, guilt, sympathy, love as well as conflicted. I will not defend the way I feel, because they are mine and they are neither right or wrong.
Seeing my dad motionless breaks my heart. I don't feel I need to show it, but I do feel the pain. My hope is in the Lord that he may raise my father from his coma to a new beginning.
These last 16 days have been difficult for everyone. I have been trying my best to still carry on at home with my daughters who have no clue what is going on. It is difficult at times, to laugh with them, but I must. I don't want them seeing me crying all the time. I must carry on for them and my husband. John has been extremely supportive of me and family and I thank him for that.
Seeing my dad in a coma makes me appreciate my family even more. If you are angry at someone, make amends. If you hate someone, forgive them. If you are not getting along with someone, sit down and talk about each other differences and don't leave without a solution. If you don't, you will come to regret it. I have.
Life is too short and we only have a short time to make it right.
Coffee only when one of my girls has woken up in the middle of the night
2. What's your typical breakfast on workdays, and what on weekends?
Weekend: John's Ultimate Weekend Breakfast
3. What do you drink through the day?
Water. Plain and simple.
4. Best snack?
Starbucks Banana Nut Bread. Delicious!
5. Your favourite dinner when you cook for yourself alone?
I don't cook for myself, therefore, I pick up the phone and place an order to my favorite restaurant. Plain and simple. Why cook, right!
Monday, April 26, 2010
I heard someone say that I am in a coma.
It doesn't feel real.
The noise here is unlike anything I have ever known.
There seems to be activity all around me,
but I cannot move, cannot open my eyes.
There are bits and pieces of memory. Fragments.
Fragments of thoughts, and sound, and sensation.
I just woke up again, but still can't move,
or let anyone know that I can hear.
My body won't move and my eyes still won't open.
For some reason I cannot stay awake.... if this is awake.
I am drifting as though on an ocean.
I drift within sight of shore but can't reach the shore,
or make myself heard. No one sees that I am here.
The tides carry me away again
and blackness envelopes me, and I feel nothing.
When you come to see me please talk to me.
Please tell me something familiar.
I need something familiar to hold on to.
I need your touch and contact with you,
even if I can't respond.
I need a connection with sounds, talk,
and voices that are familiar to me. –Stephanie.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
So here's another pretty BAD movie review from your inexperience movie critic.
If you have seen Independence Day, War of the Worlds and the Day After Tomorrow, rolled these three movies into one and you get 2012. The difference between these three past movies is that they were good! 2012 is about the crust on the earth sinking due to some odd solar inefficiency happening right on 2012, a year that the Maya's had predicted the world would come to an end. What's worse is that the top global officials all knew about it and knew exactly the day and time when the world would start going into turmoil and all they do is build three state of the art ships/submarines and charge the wealthy a Billion Euros to save their own skin but you must get to China prior to that dreadfully day. Woody Harrison was the only watchable person in this movie and his role was small. We gave this movie a 2.5 out of 5 stars and the 2.5 goes for the Graphic people.
Movie: Inglorious Basterds
This movie is about a small group of American Jew Soldiers going to France to well, kill Nazis. If you have seen Quentin Tarintino movies in the past, expect the unexpected. Brad Pitt stars as one of the Inglorious bandits and his accent is hilarious! Fun movie to watch. If you think someone might live, expect them to die. If you expect a character in the movie to die, expect them to live.
Someone I thought that might live, died! We give a 3 out 5 stars. The 3 stars go out to Brad Pitt's southern accent. -Sandra.
I only went to this Stadium once and it wasn't to watch the Cowboys play, nope. I went to see PINK FLOYD!! back in my glory days! or as I look back my stupid days.
Friday, April 9, 2010
2. Doctor visit #1 Dialog:
Dr: So, Sandra, what are you doing to prevent another pregnancy?
me: Nothing, Doc.
Dr: I suggest putting you in some really good pregnancy pills or we got this thing we can inject you with where it will last 5 years, so that you don't have to worry about taking daily pills.
me: No, thanks. I'm doing the controlling my self, you know, the traditional way.
Dr: You know, scientifically, the traditional way has never worked.
me: For me, it has so, it is good enough.
After this conversation, I felt his mood changed because he couldn't sell me on "his method." But, whatever!
3. Doctor visit #2 Dialog:
Dr: Hello, Sandra! How about them Texas Rangers?
me: How about them, doc? My left foot is still in pain, and now my right foot is in pain!
Dr: Look at that Sandra! We got someone in second base!
me: I see.
Dr: Maybe while I check on you, we'll win this game.
me: At any rate, I have been feeling pain in my right foot where there was never any pain before. What do you suggest and by the way, my left foot still doesn't feel 100% it feels more like 70%
Dr: I see, you have been putting alot of weight on your right foot so that's why your Plantar Fasciitis feels tender. OOOHHH LOOOK! WE GOT ALL THE BASES COVERED!!!!
me: great... (he can't take his eyes away from the computer monitor)
me: So, what do you suggest....
Dr: I suggest another round of injections.
me: really? I thought you told me two months ago that one round would be enough
Dr: for some people it is enough, but I see that we may have to go with another round for you, it is your choice.
me: I see
Dr: So, what's it going to be? HOLY CRAP!! WE WON!!
me: please inject me.
4. Someone has been eating way my salsa from work. I keep it on our workplace fridge and Monday, I saw that it was all gone! I WAS MAD! I wrote a note and taped it on top of the lid that said: To the Salsa Thief. You had no right to steal my salsa. It would be nice if you replaced it but you are not because you are a salsa eater thief!
My co-worker thinks he knows who he is because someone has been eating away his salsa too.
5. I hired a personal trainer. His name is John Seaman. Thankfully, he comes free of charge. He gave me this training to follow after his very successful training, he has lost over 20 lbs and he has keep it off. So, last night, was day one and my upper body aches.
While doing arm weights, this guy comes and sits by the machine right besides me and says:
Gym dude: excuse me, I was wondering, are you of Indian descent. (not American Indian, but from India.)
me: No, I'm not.
Gym dude: I bet you get that I lot.
me: You know, as a matter of fact, I do. Every time I pull my hair back in a pony tail and every time I visit one of those convenient stores and the guy that sits behind the counter is Indian, starts talking to my in their language.
Gym dude: Must be your dark features.
me: must be. (seriously, I have been told I look Indian or Middle Eastern, always!)
I told John about this conversation and he said that the Gym dude was flirting with me, I said, he wasn't or I didn't feel like he was. I feel is ok to talk to people. Then John said that no one ever talks to him when he's at the gym, I said, that's funny because people are always talking to me, John said, it is because I'm a girl.
I'm cutting my hair short very soon so I don't get confused by something that I'm not. -Sandra.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Andrew and Raquel.
Boys will be boys.
This Is Why He Came and Died
By: Chuck Colson
Reflections on Good Friday
Can it really be just three months ago we gathered with loved ones to celebrate Christmas? What joy we felt as we celebrated the birth of the baby Jesus. Emmanuel. God with us.
But today, on Good Friday, we reflect on how that beautiful babe in the manger came to fulfill a mission. A terrible and glorious mission! God invaded planet Earth. He became a human child, to live as one of us, to call us to repent, to love God with our whole heart, minds, and souls, and our neighbors as ourselves.
And today we should tremble and shudder as we remember the horrible climax of His mission. Beaten, scourged, mocked, and stabbed, Jesus mounted the cross, receiving the just punishment for your sins. For my sins. For the sins of the world.
This is why He came and died.
Yes, Easter is coming. The light is at the end of the tunnel. But that’s days away. Today, stop. Think about why He came and died.
He came because He knew that mankind was lost. He knew that we would kill our own babies in the womb by the millions. And that many would call this horrible evil good.
This is why He came and died.
He knew that hatred would drive men and women to strap bombs to themselves to kill innocent people in the name of religion.
This is why He came and died.
He knew that man would deny that God was his creator. That man would seek to remake himself in his own image, tamper with the genetic code, and treat human life as mere test-tube material.
This is why He came and died.
And He knew that His own bride, the Church, would grow cold and distant, forgetful of the faith given once for all. Comfortable with the world and its ways. Seeking relevance instead of love, pleasure instead of holiness.
This is why He came and died.
And He knew that you and I, covered with sin, could never stand before God, our all-holy Father, without His supreme sacrifice.
So today, don’t look ahead to Easter. Instead, reflect on the Passion. Examine your life. And repent! Repent of your sins, repent of your coldness of heart. Ask God to grant you the desire to serve Him, your Lord and Master, with all your strength.
And then, please, ask God for a spirit of repentance and revival to sweep down upon the Church—and upon the nations of the world. It is our only hope in these terrible, dark times.
We speak so often on BreakPoint about Christianity being not just a relationship with Jesus, but an all-encompassing worldview—a way to see and understand all reality. But the Christian worldview is brought into focus only by the cross.
Indeed, if the joy of Christmas and the glory of Easter are the light by which we see all reality, then the cross, Good Friday, is the lens through which we see it.
Allow me to recommend a wonderful resource to help you meditate on the depth and wonder of Good Friday—and how it defines all of reality. It’s called Death on a Friday Afternoon: Meditations on the Last Words of Jesus, written by my dear friend, the late Richard John Neuhaus.
May God bless you on this terrible, wonderful day.
Friday, April 2, 2010
Here's Raquel finally at the garden! John likes to start training when they are young. Second apprentice on the works!
Want to save more money? Do it yourself!
John did tons of research on which product to use and he went green.
We did it in two nights in a row. This was the first night. The second night we were beaten. Well, I was.
John in the attic.
Me, checking out the attic when we got done...never been up there until now and never again, got dizzy.