Saturday, January 3, 2009

I Am Second

In the past few months, we have noticed billboards in the Dallas area that have the message "I am second" and not until last night John and I decided that we needed to see what that message was all about. After we did, he and I were crying. Check out the website.

http://iamsecond.com/

and yes, I am second as well. In the winter of 2007, I received the divorce papers and that's when it finally hit me, I am alone. Then my spirit started to break down. I was faced with two options; be depressed and drink or be depressed and seek the Lord. I didn't want to drink anymore so, I decided to seek the Lord but I didn't know how. The months ahead were difficult for me, I felt my spirit being torn apart, one by the divorce and the failure of my marriage and on the other side by the Lord, he was mending my soul and it really hurt. Looking back at the mending of my soul, I felt him search me and within the search he rescue this little girl that I had abandoned for so long...the emotionally and physically abused little girl that I had tucked away deep in my heart.

One of the commentators in this website states the abuse his father inflicted upon him left him with scars, the ones that you can't see; the same happened to me and to rescue what was left of her, I safely tucked her away in a safe place where no one could see her scars, I was afraid of anyone seeing her, afraid they could see my scars and take advantage of her again so I hid her and protected whatever was left of her.

During the winter of 2007, the Lord kept saying to me "all is not lost" it was hard to believe because everything before me was dissolving, it was hard to trust Him but I had nothing to lose anymore so I kept going. At the end I was able to be the person that I was before my scars were inflicted within me and so the awakening begin in Him. The rest of the story most of you know. Without Him, I wouldn't be here telling this story. I am second and always will be. -Sandra.

2 comments:

Jo said...

I can't find your email address for some reason and I need to send you an invitation. Just email it when you get a chance. Thanks

John, Sandra and Sofia Seaman said...

Hi Jo

My email is sseaman@HNTB.com and Johns is johnse@fsgi.com

Take Care
Sandra